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Fluffy
The Gregorys kidnap Fluffy to spite the Kahns; Dionne Tsung learns about Jake's crush on Elijah. Plot In the Gregory mansion, Mia Gregory is ranting about the Kahns' glory to her sister Crystal. "Those motherfucking, crayon-looking bastards think they run everything." Mia exclaims in anger. "Well dear, they actually do run everything at this point," Crystal says, "Because at least when Shao Kahn was running things, we could actually try to be happy." "Daddy was fucking right, Shao Kahn is the better emperor," Mia says, "But nevertheless, we have to hit them hard. Somewhere that wounds them drastically..." In Kahn Palace, Jake is floating passed Mace and Ace's room when he sees it empty and decides to peek in. "Hmmm, I wonder..." Jake says to himself and starts typing on the twins' portal computer where they practically spy on everyone in the universe. Soon after, Mace and Ace float into their room with their Scarbucks coffee and shocked to see Jake on their computer. "Jake, why the...actually, who the fuck left the computer unlocked?" Ace exclaims, pointing blame on Mace. "Yeah, that's on me." Mace says sadly. "Oh, I'm sorry, I just wanted to see-" Jake says, being cut off by Ace who says, "Elijah Al-Sallal naked." "Well I just figured if you were able to get Jamal naked for Ro Ro, you'd basically have everybody naked." Jake says, feeling guilty. "Well, yeah fucking of course. It records on a never ending cycle, from literally the day they're born." Mace says. "Plus, with perfect timing, he's actually in the shower now, so I didn't have to actually try to find it." Jake says, staring at the screen. Mace and Ace deduce that Jake has a crush on Elijah and decide to let him watch the portal camera until Elijah gets out of the shower, afterwards the three float downstairs to the study floor and converse about Jake's crush. "So...how long have you had a crush on him, because from what I understand, he's never been to the palace." Mace says, perplexed. "I've liked him for a while, and it started when I first met him at his house when I went with Ro Ro to visit Jamal." Jake says. "Vraiment?" Ace asks in French. "I'm not learning French from you, I'm learning German so I don't know what that means." Jake explains. "It means 'really', and you've never done anything about you liking him?" Ace asks. Dionne Tsung, who snuck into the palace through a window, hides behind a bookshelf to spy on the brothers' conversation. "Well, I'm slightly embarrassed and scared. I haven't had a boyfriend since that, that, female dog Dionne Tsung took Scorpion from me." Jake says sad and embarrassed, leaving the twins perplexed. "Wasn't that like, a year ago?" Mace asks. "Yeah, and the only thing I've done about Elijah is attempt to build a statue out of him, hoping to make it as realistic as possible with skin tone and every detail." Jake says. Mace and Ace just stare at Jake, disgusted at what he said. Ro Ro is floating down to the dungeon after filling all the puppies' bowls and is going to feed Andy, Hope and Fluffy. When he gets to the dungeon and is finished feeding Andy and Hope, he turns to Fluffy's spot and sees him missing and screams loudly. Mia and Crystal are driving through the Wastelands in a pickup truck with a large trailer attached to it with an incapacitated Fluffy in it. "This 'ought to really get those disgusting Kahns now." Crystal gloats, and speeds up the truck. Back at the palace, Ro Ro is petrified in tears and curled up in his throne with Nya, Jabari, the B. Brothers and Ice around him. "Who could've possibly done such a thing?" Ro Ro exclaims, crying hysterically. "I mean, it's very odd, I will admit that. But who the fuck would take a giant three-headed dog?" Bitch Puddin' questions. "Well obviously, someone who knows that Fluffy's very dear to our family, meaning no doubt it's probably the Gregorys." Nya suggests. "Oh Kahn, Nya, your hatred for them makes you think that everything is basically their fault. How do we know it wasn't the Flames, or the last remaining Archer, or some other fucker that hates us?" Jabari says. "Look, don't push it Jabari-" Nya is cut off by Bitch Puddin' who says, "Well he actually does have a point, for once. It might be someone of course other than the Gregory's that want to fuck with us." Bitch Puddin', Jabari and Nya begin to argue, making everyone else argue, prompting Ro Ro to yell out, "The dognapping of a beloved pet is already tearing us apart!" This makes everyone stop and feel bad. Dionne reveals herself and says, "Speaking of tearing things apart, I'm going to go tear the little bit of nothing you have with Elijah, and I'll show you that you'd never have a chance with him." Jake throws his shurikens at her, but she dodges and cartwheels out of the palace doors. "Sorry Ro, but I've gotta go deal with an Asian pest that never ceases to leave me alone." Jake says, flying out the doors, and Mace and Ace decide to go with him. Ro Ro squints angrily towards his parting brothers, and look towards Bitch Puddin', Nya, Loveolas and Ice for help. "Well, all the other B. Brothers are gone, so..." Bitch Puddin' says, and then goes to his room. "Boo, it looks like it's up to us true children of Shao Kahn to get our dog back!" Ro Ro says. "It's also up to the true children of Sindel, because I'm going upstairs to continue watching OutTube." Ice says. "Nigga, you're coming too." Loveolas says before grabbing Ice. In the Wastelands, Crystal and Mia are keeping Fluffy captive in an underground stronghold when the rest of the Gregorys arrive. "Hi mom, how's being pregnant?" Mia asks, annoyed at her mother's unexpected pregnancy. "Oh shut up, you should know how being pregnant feels with all the abortions you've had." Cecelia says, causing Mia to gasp in embarrassment. "So, you kidnapped the Kahns' beloved mutt." Michael says, causing Fluffy to growl and attempt to attack but is electrocuted by the cage's bars. "Where'd you get electric bars?" Amelia asks. "You know, there's a store right down the street from here that I'm beginning to think is actually illegal." Crystal answers. At the Al-Sallals' home Elijah and Jamal are lying in their bunk bed, with Elijah watching OutTube and Jamal watching anime when there's a knock on the door. Jasmin goes to answer it and is perplexed to see Dionne, who she doesn't know. "Can I see Elijah, please?" Dionne asks, putting on her "nicest" face. "Who are you exactly?" Jasmin asks. "I'm Dionne Tsung, daughter of Shang Tsung, the greatest sorcerer in the realm so Quan Chi can suck it." Dionne answers. Even more confused, Jasmin just says, "Ok..." and calls for Elijah. Elijah comes to the door and Dionne immediately pounces on him and exposes her bra. "Look, I know you're a horny raging hormone teen who's just dying for any type of sex he can get, so take me now!" Dionne exclaims. Mace, Ace and Jake make it just in time as Dionne is struggling to force herself on Eli, and Jake exclaims, "Get away from him, you bitch!" and he grabs Dionne off Elijah with his hair. Mace and Ace sit and look amazed and Mace says, "I know this isn't his first time cursing but wow." and Ace continues, saying, "And he cursed using an Aliens reference." A fight ensues between Dionne and Jake once again with Jake accidentally ripping her bra off and Dionne overpowering him with magic and hand-to-hand combat. "What in the actual fuck is going on here?" Mace asks, watching the fight with Ace. "Well she did rip Elijah's shirt off and he's light skinned enough and cute for me, so if I were in the same position, I'd be a bit distracted too." Ace says. Jake uses his nails to claw through one of Dionne's face and knocks her down, but she soon gets back up and tackles him to the ground. "I know this is a Ro Ro thing," Ace says, staring at Elijah and obviously enjoying the view, "But I'd totally lick his somewhat belly button." Mace just sits quietly watching the fight, weirded out by his twin's comment. Jake and Dionne struggle for quite sometime and Mace decides to do something about it and when Dionne is off guard he runs up and jams his mace into her left breast, causing it to deflate. "Bitch, you mean to tell me that shit wasn't real?" Elijah exclaims, and finally decides to shut the door. Dionne screams in horror and says, "You whore, do you know how much that fucking costs?" "You're telling me you're the daughter of 'the greatest sorcerer in the realm' and you still have to buy fake breasts?" Ace asks. "I don't know a spell for silicon!" Dionne cries before Jake pops her other breast with a shuriken, and she runs away. "Kahn, I hope Ro Ro's having an easier time getting Fluffy back." Jake says. In the stronghold, Ro Ro and the gang refuse to waste anytime fighting the Gregorys and have Ice freeze their way through the stronghold. At the cage, Ro Ro starts to break Fluffy out of the cage using his hair, but Mia, who hid from Ice freezing the rest of her family, attempts to grab Ice from behind but starts to scream in pain and complains about burning. "What the hell's happening to her?" Nya asks Ice, who's holding onto Mia's arms. "My skin's like dry ice and it freezes as a defense when I'm scared." Ice answers. "Oh my Kahn, he's torturing this bitch." Loveolas says, as they all watch Mia suffer. Ro Ro finally breaks the bars and absorbs all the electricity from the bars into his hair, giving him an overcharge. "Now where should I use this extra energy?" Ro Ro asks sarcastically, looking at a suffering Mia. Ice lets go of her and before she can recover, Ro Ro grabs her by the neck with his hair and gives her the shock of a lifetime, causing her to black out. Ro Ro hugs Fluffy's right leg and says how much he missed and loves him, and the gang rides Fluffy home into the sunset. Short: Girl Talk with Anaya Kahn (Hell Hath No Fury) ”Hello girls, and a few boys. Today we’re gonna talk about the schematics of female emotions, more specifically, our anger. Now most boys are always complaining about their girlfriends being mad at them and them not knowing what they did wrong or what they need to do to fix it. Lucky for you all, we’re gonna talk about what makes us mad, how serious it may or may not be, and what you can do to fix it. I’d also love to introduce a special guest today. She’s a big part of my life and in all reality, not a really good role model. Please welcome my aunt — Chica Kahn!” *audience claps as Chica walks onstage* Chica: “It’s nice to be here dearest, I’m honored to be on your show and address why men always piss us off in every imaginable way.” ”It’s nice to have you too auntie Chica. I’m sure we all know the iconic saying ‘Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned,’ and if you don’t, now you know. It’s basically saying that when you’re condemned to hell the punishments are nothing compared to a pissed off woman.” Chica: “Especially after her vibrator done ran out of batteries or the charger broke or some shit. Yeah, I’m usually always pissed as fuck when that happens.” ”Um, auntie Chica we’re not really, um, talking about that kind of anger. We’re talking about when a man has either made a woman upset by saying something that offends her, if he cheats on her with another woman—“ Chica: “Or another man.” ”Or another man, I guess, it does happen sometimes but it’s rare. Granddad Ro Ro says that boys are scared to be gay which I do see as true sometimes but back to the topic of discussion. 95% of the time, a woman’s anger is serious and the only thing that can solve her problem when she’s angry because of her boyfriend is her boyfriend‘s admittance that he’s wrong.” Chica: “We’re usually upset with the fact that these men don’t believe that female orgasms exist. I want to fucking cum too, it’s not always about you busting a fucking nut!” ”Um, well that’s all the time we had auntie Chica, I think it’s time you just go home and get some rest.” Chica: “Whatever. I’m just gonna go home and pull out my vibrator anyway and pray that your grandfather doesn’t float pass.” Trivia * It is hinted that Michael may not be the father of Cecilia's unborn child.